Alyssa Woiak Hey what's up
Joe Jiko fighting sleep and sickness. you?
Alyssa Woiak Um nothen chillen being really bored haha I hope u feel better ! Where u from?
Joe Jiko I'm from everywhere. Currently live in Florida.
Alyssa Woiak Oh cool what part of florida
Joe Jiko tampa bay
Alyssa Woiak Oh that's cool your hott btw lol
Joe Jiko oh thanks
Alyssa Woiak Your welcome how old r u ? And do u drive
Joe Jiko I'm ageless and of course I drive.
Alyssa Woiak No really how old r u ? I am 23
Joe Jiko No really, I don't have an age. >__>
Alyssa Woiak What year were u born
Joe JikoI wasn't born.
I woke up with no memory.
Alyssa WoiakU r such a lier u had 2 be born u didn't just fall the earth with no mom
Joe Jiko Perhaps I did!
I could be an alien from space.
I always thought I was because I have no belly button.
Alyssa Woiak Wtf I don't believe u
Um I don't believe that either
Joe Jiko OK, well it doesn't really matter, does it?
You can pretend I'm 100 if you want.
Alyssa Woiak Um u were born with a belly button lol
Joe Jiko I already told you, I wasn't born.
Alyssa Woiak yea u were I wi
Will call the cops and ask if u r real and ask what year u were born
Joe Jiko Haha. Why would the cops reveal private information?
Alyssa Woiak Um I have a friend that's a cop and he would tell me
Joe Jiko That would be illegal. He wouldn't tell you.
And if he did, I would sue both of you.
Alyssa Woiak Oh well I will ask him and u couldn't sue shit because u don't kno his name
Joe Jiko I know your name and I know how to file a civil lawsuit. I know how to get a court order to have facebook reveal your name, address, IP address and any other information about you. I also know how to research people you know and people who live near you who might be police officers.
Alyssa Woiak um well they live out of state and u were born feb
Joe Jiko LOL. No I wasn't. That's just what I put on facebook.
I think it's amusing seeing people wish me a happy birthday on a day that's not actually my birthday.
Alyssa Woiak um well yea i can find out your info but i am not doing it someone else is so i have no part in it
Joe Jiko Silly girl.
Alyssa Woiak what sexy
i am gonna text u okj
Joe Jiko I don't do texting. I have a smartphone meh.
Alyssa Woiak u have a cell phone and it has texingh i bet
Joe Jiko It does, but I haven't used it for texting in years.
I only use my phone for business, actually.
Alyssa Woiak OH WELL
Joe Jiko I'm older than you
Alyssa Woiak oh i see well i want u 2 text me
how old r u
Joe Jiko 100
Alyssa Woiak no
i am gonna find out when u were born and everything but my friend is doping it for me
so i wont be in it
Joe Jiko Haha. You won't find anything on me. My information is classified. I work for the government.
In fact, if your "friend" tries to look up my information, I'll be notified.
Alyssa Woiak um yea they can they know how 2 do that kind of shit with out u finding out about it cuz they work threw the cops
Joe Jiko Not without a court order. Which he'll never get, since he has no reason to look up my private information.
Alyssa Woiak i really dont fucking care u r not hott like i thought
Joe Jiko Awwh. Am I too complicated for you?
Alyssa Woiak no your not my type and i live out of state
Joe Jiko Oh, I thought you just wanted to be friends.
Alyssa Woiak um i want a bf but not someone thats a dick
Joe Jiko Excuse me?
Are you calling me a dick after you threatened to have your cop friend investigate me and violate my privacy?
Alyssa Woiak what
Joe Jiko or are you calling me a dick for not revealing my age to you?
Alyssa Woiak all the above
Joe Jiko Then you're the dick.
Alyssa Woiak um no i dont have one
Joe Jiko All evidence supports you being a dick.
You must have one. I bet it's enormous.
Alyssa Woiak um no i have a pussy
Joe Jiko So vulgar.
Alyssa Woiak wtf
My favorite parts were:

  •  "Oh that's cool your hott btw lol" <-- incorrect use of "your"

  • "Will call the cops and ask if u r real and ask what year u were born" <-- wtf??

  • "I don't do texting. I have a smartphone meh." after the "I don't do texting" part is an implied "with people who can't spell"

What was your favorite part?  Let me know in the comments :)

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