Joe Jiko Having sex doesn't mean you're cheating. As soon as someone else is more important than your partner, that's real cheating. Sex is just an activity.
Alli Ohmes And so as long as who you're having sex with means nothing to you, it's not cheating on your significant other?
Joe Jiko You got it Alli
Alli Ohmes Wow. I'm glad there's decent men out there that don't feel that way. That's kinda fucked up
Note: “That’s kinda fucked up” has no meaning whatsoever. I try to dig deeper into her thought process.
Joe Jiko How is it? Does it affect you if another person has sex with someone else? It's a physical activity with no lasting effects.. Also, don't assume because I don't believe in "physical cheating" rules that I practice them. open your mind and withhold your judgment.. If you're able.
Note: Alli mentions it later, but here I’m obviously assuming there are no outside variables such as pregnancy or STDs.
Bobby Hayslett No lasting effects to you. some of us only make love to ones we care for and only them
Note: I don’t even know why this guy bothers talking. What does saying that “some” people “make love” to only the people they care about have to do with the discussion that sex has no negative or lasting effects? Vague, generic, and.. irrelevant. Also, I’d like to point out that sex is a physical activity whereas love is an emotional response. The two are generally associated but aren’t necessarily directly related. For example, it’s possible to love someone and NOT have sex with them OR to have sex with someone and NOT love them which renders this argument invalid.
Joe Jiko But who's to say my way is "less decent" than your way?
Bobby Hayslett Morals do
Joe Jiko My morals or yours? do you think everyone feels exactly as you do? Do you think they will in 100 years? Morals change with the times. The reality is, there is no right or wrong especially if what you're doing has no negative effect on outside parties. And FYI, I've been with the same girl for over a year and have only "made love" to her. So be careful who you're calling the bad guy.
Bobby Hayslett Cheating has plenty if negative effects. You practice too much of what you preach and have blinded yourself of trueness of the heart
Note: This guy isn’t really contributing but I left him in here anyway.
Joe Jiko I've done no such thing. Nice try though. If you have a closed mind, there's no purpose in trying to explain life to you.
Note: In retrospect, I should’ve just ignored him.
Alli Ohmes I never said you do practice them, just that what you said is kinda fucked up, in my views and obviously others. Having sex with someone shouldn't come as easy as people think now. Just having sex with someone you don't give a shit about is wrong to me, and that doubles if you have made a commitment to someone else to be with them.
Note: Using other people’s views as a defense of your own does NOT count as supporting evidence. Why do other people have that view? Why do you share other peoples' views?
She states that “having sex with someone shouldn’t come as easy as people think”, that’s a generic statement with no meaning whatsoever. Is she assuming that people think that way? Why is she citing hypothetical thoughts of other people in opposite defense of her own?
“Just having sex with someone you don’t give a shit about is wrong to me”
Finally! She’s actually using her own view! OK! You think having emotionally detached sex is wrong.. but why? There are still no reasons..
“Doubles if you have made a commitment to someone else to be with them”
Ahh! Does everyone make the same commitment? Aren’t all relationships unique? Should there be rules and restrictions? Why?
Joe Jiko Why is it wrong? Because somebody taught you so? Do you ever think about the things you believe or do you follow along thoughtlessly?
Bobby Hayslett If joe has been with a girl for a year and hasent had sex with other girls then why is he saying this? It's making no sense and its contradicting
Note: I choose not to answer him, but at least he’s thinking. I’ve been with one person for a year and I haven’t wanted to have sex with anyone else. This is purely a coincidence! If it ever happens that I want to engage in sex with someone other than the person I’m in a titled relationship with.. I will. Why should there be unnecessary restrictions? I truly believe that restricting a person’s life is unhealthy and ultimately leads to increased discontent or unhappiness. The exception would be restricting a person from performing actions that affect others negatively.. such as murder. I could understand if my actions had a negative effect.. but if reasonable steps are taken to ensure that both parties are clear of STDs and there’s no pregnancy (which arguably would still not affect a 3rd party), there should be none!
Alli Ohmes Sex does have lasting effects as well, there's stds and unwanted pregnancies, which both wouldn't be as big a deal if you're with someone you learned to trust before trying to fuck. And it causes chemicals in the brain to be released making you feel a bond with who you've fucked and all kinds of other shit.
Note: Riiiiiight chemicals in the brain. The same ones that occur with every emotion? Stress? Anger? Similar to the ones that occur with medicine, drugs, food, alcohol, and any other chemical intake. Those emotions may provoke a reaction, but free will gives us the ability to deny the default action. Just because you feel angry doesn’t mean you’ll act on it. Just because you feel amorous (temporarily) doesn’t mean the feeling is going to stick around. I think I’ve already touched on the STDs/pregnancy stem.
“someone you learned to trust before trying to fuck”
I’d like to point out that NOWHERE did I mention fucking anyone I didn’t trust.
Alli Ohmes I do think about things, I don't just follow along thoughtlessly. That's why I'm part of a very small percentage of teenagers who doesn't believe sex should just be with anyone because you're turned on or think that they are hot; there's much more to it.
Joe Jiko There's actually not more to it. Sex is for reproduction.. Nothing else.
Alli Ohmes Then why do it without trying to reproduce? Why are there condoms and birth control? You ever think it could be about making the person you love feel good? But that would require knowing who you're in.
Note: I should’ve said “reproduction, recreation, and exercise”.
“That would require knowing who you’re in”
Again, not sure why she thinks I’m talking about anonymous sex when it’s never mentioned.
Joe Jiko „@alli i'm out of time to reply :/ if you'd like to continue this conversation feel free to message me.
Please feel free to voice your opinion in the comments.